Spooky Vittles
choose one to bring to the party
let me know which on the invite or via email

Tuna Spooks (or Chicken Salad Spooks, whatever you like)

(2) 8-ounce cans white tuna, packed in water
3 tablespoons mayonnaise or plain yogurt
1/2 teaspoon curry powder
1 tablespoon honey mustard
20 slices wheat bread, crust removed
Whipped cream cheese
Black olive slices for garnish

Mix the tuna, mayonnaise, curry powder, and mustard in a medium bowl. Cut the bread slices with a cookie cutter shapes like a ghost, bat, pumpkin, or gingerbread man. Spread 10 slices with the tuna mixture and cover with the second slice of bread.Now spread the top of each "spook" with cream cheese. Use 2 slices of olives to make eyes on each. Makes 10 sandwiches

Creepy Monster Fingers

Makes about 3 1/2 dozen cookies
Ghoulishly great Halloween cookies! The sickly green fingers will have folk laughing and grossing out at the same time. The best part? They're absolutely delicious and oh-so-simple to make. 
2 3/4 cups all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 cup (2 sticks) butter, softened
1 cup confectioners' sugar
1 egg
1 1/2 teaspoons almond extract
Green food coloring
Sliced almonds

1. In a medium bowl, sift together the flour, baking powder and salt. In a large bowl, using an electric mixer set on medium, beat the butter until creamy. Beat in the confectioners' sugar, egg and almond extract. Gradually beat in the flour mixture until a soft dough forms.
2. Tint the dough, using a few drops of food coloring. Cover the dough with plastic wrap and chill until just firm, about 45 minutes.
3. Preheat the oven to 350F. For each cookie, using lightly floured hands, roll tablespoonfuls of the dough into finger shapes. Using a knife, mark knuckle lines across the center of each finger. Lightly flatten the end of each finger. Press sliced almonds on flattened areas for fingernails.
4. Place the finger shapes on ungreased baking sheets. Bake the cookies until they are firm and the bottoms begin to turn golden, 18 to 20 minutes. Transfer cookies to wire racks; cool completely. 
GLOP OF MOLDY (Guacamole)

2  ripe avocados, peeled and pitted
2 tablespoons lime juice
1/2 small onion
1/2 small tomato
1 jalapeno pepper, seeded
1/2 cup chopped cilantro
2 tablespoons canned chopped green chiles
1 teaspoon salt

Upchuck Dip w/Boar Skins

2 cups cottage cheese 
2 hard-boiled egg yolks 
1/4 cup mayonnaise 
1 or 2 TBL ground hot peppers or Tabasco Sauce 
2 TBL finely chopped onion 
Salt and Pepper to taste 
A few drops lemon juice 

Mash cottage cheese and egg yolks with pastry blender.  Add mayonnaise and mix well. 
Add peppers, onion, salt, pepper or Tabasco Sauce and lemon juice. Beat well.  Serve chilled with pork rinds as an appetizer.
1 whole cauliflower
Spinach and Artichoke Dip 
assorted raw vegetables, crackers for dipping
Cut florets from the top of the cauliflower until you have a cauliflower 'bowl'. Remove greens from bottom. Cut stems from radishes, leave the root, remove skin. Using toothpicks and food coloring, draw an eyeball on the flat part of the radish (where the top was). The root will look like the optic nerve. Fill cauliflower with dip, garnish with radish 'eyes', serve with veggies and crackers.


Put out a bowl of peas (in cream sauce, if you like - I think they make a frozen version of peas and onions in cream sauce that would work juuuuust fine).  Cut out bread slices in the shape of mini headstones.  Toast them.  Put the crouton "headstones" into the bowl of peas... instant "graveyard".

Optician's Glass Eye Display

 1 jar of gherkins (baby sized pickles)
2 "Slim Jim" sausages (like at the check out counter - the round kind)
bunch spring onions (scallions)
12 cold, cooked shrimp, cleaned, shelled and without head or tail
2 packages cream cheese, softened
1 package ranch dressing mix
1/4 c mayonnaise or sour cream, your choice
salt and white pepper to taste
several dashes Tabasco sauce or a dash of cayenne
1 large package of paper thin deli meat, your choice (except salami)

Mummy dogs (aka pigs in a blanket).
Peppercorns are used for the eyes and
biscuit dough for the "wrapping".
Mix the cream cheese, mayonnaise, ranch dressing mix, Tabasco, salt and pepper in large bowl.  Make sure it's in a very thick spreading, frosting - like consistency. Lay individual slices of thinly sliced lunchmeat on clean surface, and slather each slice with 1/4 inch thick layer of cream cheese mix.  Lay the Slim Jims each on a slice.  Use 2 pieces of lunchmeat if they aren't long enough.  Roll the Slim Jim up in the piece(s) of lunchmeat.  Repeat this in the same fashion with the rest of the lunchmeat and the scallions (one at a time), and the pickles and shrimp (lined up long ways in a line, to make a rolled up 'stick' shape inside the lunchmeat) Put your lunchmeat "batons" on a plate, cover with saran wrap and chill for 1 hour, up to 24 hours. Just before your party, lay your "meat batons" on a cutting board.  With a sharp knife, cut them into 1 inch rounds, so they look like bull's-eyes.   Line them up on a large serving dish, with the centers showing.  Place one or two plastic novelty eyeballs amongst them for effect. Garnish with parsley.

Nightcrawlers in a Bait Bucket

1 child's plastic sand pail, labeled "bait" in black marker on the outside; or a new bait pail, thoroughly cleaned and dried

1 package whole wheat linguini, prepared, drained and cooled
1 can black beans, drained
1 c prepared pesto sauce
1 c shredded parmesan or Asiago cheese
1 avocado, peeled and chopped into small chunks
1 small can sliced black olives, drained, or Creole olive salad (muffeletta spread)

Puree 1/2 of the can of black beans in a food processor or blender. Add a little olive oil if needed to aid in pureeing.

Combine pureed beans and the remaining whole beans, as well as the rest of the ingredients in a large bowl, tossing to combine well. Season with salt and pepper to taste. Pour into "bait pail" and garnish with clean garden spade or the sand shovel that comes with the bucket.

Enucleated Werewolf Eyes
1 (12 ounce) package ground sausage, raw and thawed - whatever kind you like except smoked (Polish or Andouille)
2 pint cartons of fresh mushrooms (either white buttons or baby Portobello)
1 (8 ounce) packages cream cheese, softened
1 cup of shredded sharp cheese - such as sharp cheddar, jack, blue cheese, Asiago or good parmesan
3/4 cup dry bread crumbs, or Japanese Panko
dash cayenne pepper or Tabasco sauce
1 tsp garlic powder
salt and black pepper to taste
1/2 cup red wine, if desired
pre-made pesto sauce
Preheat oven to 350º F
Clean the mushrooms by rinsing in cool water and pulling out the stems.  Try to leave the caps whole.  Save the stems for cooking later. In a large bowl, combine everything else besides the mushrooms, the pesto and mayonnaise, combine very well.
With a tablespoon or small ice cream scoop, fill each mushroom with a scoop of the filling and place filling side up on a lightly greased cookie sheet (with sides, or else you'll have a grease fire in your oven...)  Bake for 25 - 30 minutes, until browned thoroughly.
Allow to cool for 10 minutes.  Arrange on some lettuce leaves or kale on a platter.  Mix 4 tbsp pesto (you can use tomato sauce if you'd like 'red' eyes) with 4 tbsp mayonnaise in a small bowl.  With a small spoon or a pastry bag, "dot each eyeball" with a gob of the mayo mixture

Wicked Black Widow Centerpiece Prep: 30 min, Cook: 45 min, plus rising time.

4 loaves frozen Sweet Dough, thawed ... 2 eggs, beaten ...Black and red food coloring, (or dutch process cocoa powder and 2 tbsp butter if you can't find black food coloring)

Cut out your "clay":
Form one loaf into a large ball. Cut the second loaf into 3 equal parts. Form two of those 3 parts into balls. Take the last third of that loaf and cut it into 4 pieces, then roll them into small balls. Divide that last 2 loaves into 4 pieces each, and roll each piece into a short, stubby rope. (see diagram A) You can have long legs, if you want, but they might burn while you wait for the thicker pieces of dough to bake through.
Form the Spider:
Use warm water to aid you in sticking the pieces together. The largest ball is the spider's thorax (chest). The middle sized balls are it's head and abdomen - place them next to the thorax on either side. The ropes are the spider's 8 legs - place them, bent at the "knee", 4 on either side of the thorax. The 4 small balls will make the spider's face. Put two eyeballs on the spiders head, and make the spider's mouth (it looks kind of like a lobster claw, a 'pincher' - make 2 triangles from the last two pieces of dough and put them side by side on the very top of his "head" - look up a picture of a spider on the net if you think it will aid you in sculpting mr spider)
Let it rise:
Cover the dough with a piece of saran wrap that you have greased with oil or non stick spray, put it in a warm (not hot) draft - free spot. Let rise 1-1/2 to 2 hours, or until doubled in size. (If you live in the mountains it may only take about half as long to rise) Preheat oven to 350°F. Remove plastic wrap from spider. Place on a large, greased nonstick cookie sheet or on a silicone mat on a large cookie sheet.
Paint your spider:
Beat your eggs with 2 Tbsp water and divide into 2 small bowls. Add several drops of red food color to one bowl, and several drops black to the other. Using a pastry brush or large, new paintbrush, paint your black food color mixture onto everything but the eyeballs and the abdomen (tail). Paint the eyeballs red, and paint an hourglass on the abdomen in red. Fill in the rest of the tail end with black. (If you don't have food color, you can mix 1/4 c Dutch process cocoa powder mixed with a tablespoon of melted butter added to your egg wash and mix together well. Voila - a 'brown recluse' spider).
Bake at 350°F for about 45 minutes (depending on your oven). Remove from oven and allow to cool completely.
Finishing touches:
Cut a large hole, the size of a large sour cream container, from the thorax (see diagram 2). Place your bowl of dip inside the hole. Arrange the bread spider on a platter lined with fake cobwebs like you can get at Halloween. If you can find a big fake plastic fly to put in his web, it would look really cool.
As Julia would say... Bon A Petit!

Tounges on Toast
8 slices white bread
8 slices bologna
Cut each slice of bread into the shape of lips, with a slit in the middle. Cut the bologna into strips that look like tounges. Insert the bologna into the slits in the lips(so it looks like the tounges are hanging out of the mouths). Cover the bread with mustard and broil until the bread is golden brown.

Dead Man's Meatloaf

Use your favorite recipe, but instead of shaping it into a log, shape it into a corpse. Legs together, arms folded across chest. Bake as usual, but before serving, stab the poor guy in the heart and dump spaghetti sauce over him and serve him up on a bed of green Ramen noodles. Guaranteed to gross out just about anyone!
isn't it ironic that the bologna gets turned BACK into a tongue?


For the MONSTER list of freaky foods... oh my... now that is scary!  
Cool stuff ... if you can't find  something here... you are in big trouble

Le Brea Tar pit wings

24 chicken wings (about 4 pounds) thawed
1 cup soy sauce ( get the good stuff - if it has 'Caramel Color' in the ingredients, like most of the really cheap ones do, then it's imitation soy sauce and therefore it's extremely salty)
1/2 cup red wine or good rice wine (remember - if you wouldn't want to drink it, don't cook with it either!)
1/2 cup plus 1 tablespoon dark brown sugar
1/4 teaspoon ground ginger, or 2 tsp grated fresh ginger
1/4 cup minced onion or shallot
1 Tbsp minced garlic
pepper to taste (the soy will eliminate the need for salt)
1 Tbsp fish sauce - if you have it, otherwise leave it out
juice of one lime

Cut off wing tips, reserving them for another use, and halve wings at joint.
In a small saucepan heat remaining ingredients over moderately low heat, stirring, until sugar is dissolved. Cool, and pour into large ziplock bag along with the wings. Marinate for 6 - 48 hours in refigerator.
Preheat oven to 400°F.
Arrange the wings in a pan large enough to put them in a single layer. Pour the marinade over the wings.
Bake in middle of oven 45 minutes. Turn wings over and bake until cooking liquid is thick and sticky, about 45 minutes to 1 hour more.

Transfer wings with tongs to a platter.